


Animal Whisperer

by blackkat



Series: Tumblr Drabbles [49]
Category: Naruto
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, F/F, Friendship, Gen, M/M, Naruto is a Disney Princess, his teachers are Suffering
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-03
Updated: 2017-09-02
Packaged: 2018-12-23 05:08:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 451
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11982807
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blackkat/pseuds/blackkat
Summary: For the prompt "Modern AU where the sunshine son is that one kid who's not exactly homeless but might as well be, and he spends all his time volunteering at wildlife hospitals and zoos and stuff. Comes to school with a bunch of critters he found in and around his apartment: snakes, small birds, mice, spiders, frogs. He befriends the biology nerds Shino and Shikamaru. And it is pure and wonderful and good."





	1. Chapter 1

When Kakashi wanders into the teachers’ lounge at the start of the lunch period and finds Iruka face-down on the table with Yamato patting his shoulder consolingly, he doesn’t even need to ask what’s happened. 

“Another one?” he says mildly, retrieving his lunch from the fridge. Edging the lid of the bento off, he checks inside, and - ah yes. Obito wrote out a death threat in neatly cut vegetables again. He’s so cute. “What was it this time?”

Iruka makes garbled, inarticulate noises into the wood, and Yamato winces. “A hawk,” he says, then pauses, and adds wearily, “And probably a cobra.”

Kakashi pauses, chopsticks in hand. “….A cobra.  _Probably_.”

“I couldn’t get close enough to see,” Yamato admits. “It was in his sleeve.”

Well, at least it’s probably not a danger to Naruto, if he’s been carrying it around all day, Kakashi tells himself, and tries not to dread his fifth period literature class. 

From outside the door, in the main hallway, there’s a loud scream, then a snicker. 

Kakashi winces. 

“Ino, no!” Naruto protests. “Shika didn’t mean to laugh, he was just, uh - ”

“I believe he did,” Shino says helpfully. “Why? Because he is still laughing, so clearly - “

“You  _assholes_!” At the sound of this new voice, even Iruka lifts his head in horror. “ _What did you do to my girlfriend_?”

“Sakura - “

“Run,” Shikamaru, always the clever one, advises, and then takes his own advice. Three shapes bolt past the window, running flat-out, with the star of the weight-lifting team in hot pursuit. 

Kakashi determinedly goes back to picking the eggplant out of his bento. If he didn’t see it, he doesn’t have to deal with it. 

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

"...You saw them in which classroom?” Kakashi asks, and it’s not his fault it comes out faint. 

“Bio,” Jiraiya says cheerfully, not even raising his head from the tests he’s grading. “Orochi-bastard must have finally convinced someone to listen to him rhapsodize about snakes. Though I’m kind of surprised it was Naruto - Minato definitely screamed whenever he saw a snake. Or Orochimaru, come to think of it. Where are you going? Isn’t your class in the east wing?”

“I’m feeling a little poorly,” Kakashi says quickly, sending Obito an SOS text as discretely as he can while he grabs frantically for his things. “You can cover my classes for the day, right?”

“I guess I could use the extra hours,” Jiraiya agrees, bemused, but Kakashi barely hears him; he’s already out the door and headed for the back. Probably best to just meet Obito down by the corner; staying close to the school when Naruto is conspiring with Orochimaru in addition to his usual cronies is just - a terrible idea all around.


End file.
